On Circling Home

To forget waiting, sun hours walk about the neighborhoods
where years pull. A radio flashlight bending out the orbit
will spot your edge: Clothing safer to paint around.

Don't forget the sun. Always walk on the corner,
where the pull of radio waves bending under the road
will make your heavy clothing easier to carry around.

Don't delay. The palace always turns on its corner
when the mask of homage waves. Cars under collapsed road
miles make stars heavy, as easier astronomers carry on.

-- Glenn R. Frantz

Sheriff: Halloween safety tips
Neutron star size determined
Argentina's power couple torn by death

Extensive Strawberry Outbursts

Command promoting buzzwords
have ceased to be cultivated.
Public bad manners

and criminal mischief
created the near perfect storm,
regionally becoming unstoppable.

Feed on reliable apples.
Your much ballyhooed mental health program
is a yearlong trip to Disney.

-- Scott Stoller

11 bodies, one house of horrors
Ex-flight attendant blames 'perfect storm of bad manners'
Before the Mac, Vintage Apples

Alienating Alleged Applicants

Think that we know obscurity?
Some opinions aren't grounded in reality.
Let's separate facts from fables:

We've blackmailed billionaire heiresses.
Swallowed entire empires.
Fused celebrity and forgery in novel new ways.

Raised red flags to the stratosphere.
Supported many sides in a many-sided war.
We're the biggest Achilles' heel of all.

-- Scott Stoller

Five myths about Sarah Palin
The Heiresses and the Cult
Bad online and cellphone habits can hurt your career

Explosive Gay Nun

I am an offensive saint.
I was engaged to World War II,
when the relationship was briefly excommunicated.

Boy George vindicated Bill O’Reilly
and involved a scandalous confession:
Their love gained condemnation of the rural poor.

Australia wants to Intimidate Japanese Muslims;
As a hypocritical nun
I like to insult everyone.

-Laura Beason

Bill O'Reilly on "my explosive" appearance on "The View"
Gavin Rossdale Admits To Gay Fling With Singer Marilyn
Nun whose order fought abuse becomes saint

Era of Fight

September screwed up my life, really.
6 a.m. and I want ecstasy.
“Hit this,” I pushed.

Drugs are monsters, bare and fearsome.
Violating my probation,
I am trapped underground like central China.

I am the majestic cannibal,
the unpleasant animal that bites its brother’s flesh.
Frequent feeding is not only for herbivores.

- Erin N. Sampson

Was the T-Rex a Cannibal?
21 Are Killed in Explosion at China Mine
TI Sentenced to 11 Months in Jail

The Notorious Unlikely

Surreal cartography is a nonchronological season.
It's like nonfiction: true, but unsuccessfully.
(No, this is not really cartography;

I just wandered outside for a second.
Ironically striking exactly the right theme.)
The dream underworld is unsympathetic with this critique.

Joining the Cincinnati Reds with Castro's? Why not?
Even Shakespeare the caustic realist
dabbled in Latin and harmless magic.

-- Glenn R. Frantz

Roy Halladay Throws No-Hitter in Playoff Debut
Peruvian writer/politician Mario Vargas Llosa wins Nobel Prize in Literature
Hungary toxic sludge reaches Danube branch

God Hates Honeybees

Who carried signs such as "God Hates Honeybees,"
"Fag Entomologists" and "Thank God for America's
Dead Honeybees"? Outrageous!

In Iraq, I was irked by a swamp rabbit, and now I am
throwing up at a conference on genetically modified
food that is killing off heterosexuals as punishment.

There is still a certain uncomfortable symbolism when
God, a fag, is decorating the floor with a major murder
suspect—1,000 feet from the free world.

-- Angela Genusa

Don't you know who I am? Obama loses seal of authority
Phelps's 'Outrageous' Free Speech
Possible Cause of Bee Die-Off Is Found

out of office

perhaps       a     holidaymaker
had     chosen     to     set     fire
to   his   ailing   father   rather

than   stir   passions   on   an
excursion   to     france   with
a         reclusive           general

whose         sole         intention
was       an       act       of     vice
in       the     grand       pavilion

-- Richard Mason

NKorea media say Kim Jong Un joins father at drill
West Bank mosque set on fire in attack
Sad end of the 'peerless pier'

Experimental Gossip Condoms

What have our teenagers done? A bad thing?
Their partners help men catch huge new orgasms.
They ask what do sex acts have to do with vagina.

Boys and girls say that vaginal intercourse is included
in their telephone activities. And scientists achieve truth
with a plethora of sexual relations.

Flesh and blood women are more likely to be swindled,
due to the nation’s condoms being better for sex these days.
You know, Americans have become more experimental.

-- Tom Lewis

Gossip from Manhattan & Beltway to Hollywood & Valley
Experimental Sex Practiced More Often Now in U.S.
US teens use more condoms than adults

Mechanical Capital Collapse

Converging hotel death rays singe your hair
and melt your plastic shopping bags.
Your teetering teenage daughters

prefer the streets of Quito to riding the bus alone.
College kids, befuddled by can openers,
are working on solutions.

(A government spokesman said several were wounded
but did not offer any details.)
And do we only have ourselves to blame?

-- Scott Stoller

Ecuador declares emergency as police protest
Vdara visitor: 'Death ray' scorched hair
Are we raising a generation of nincompoops?

Applause for America

America, we're getting a 100% sanitized
version of the country from the media. Why
is that pre-McNugget paste weirdly pink?

America, we're faking media orgasms. What
is with the herd of overhyped pseudo-celebrities,
mass-produced reporters, and glossy quotes?

America, we're crawling with bacteria. What
is with the grime, the reek of decades-old man-sweat?
But hey, high five! The country tastes like chicken.

-- Angela Genusa

Pre-Chicken Nugget Meat Paste
Survey on America's Sexual Habits: We're Getting Friskier
Liberty City's Roosevelt Ivory is a Throwback

Cringe-Worthy American Moments

A national telephone-based poll suggests
that American current events are, uh,
eccentric. Jesus in a pink boa drinking

sparkling Pepto-Bismol liquor in Japanese
karaoke booths, Kanye West in his red
underwear whistling ABBA through his ass,

and Jessica Rabbit singing a crude Chinese
peace anthem with a refrain of "rub me do,
rub me do." All in the preceeding 24 hours.

-- Angela Genusa

Most Americans don't get daily exercise, survey finds
Saturday Night Live Recap: Kanye Scores, Miley Mocked
Big Mac index gives more than a taste of true worth

Bellyful of Meat

These days everything is Six Degrees
of meat: a bust of Kevin Bacon
made of bacon, a dress of Lady

Gaga made of Gaga. I am he as you
are she and we are all a stick of meat
incautiously poked into the cage of a tiger.

Wait - what? I don’t know the poem
you quoted either. I just bid on eBay
for an anti-fur bird made of real hides.

-- Angela Genusa

Philip Larkin Letters to Monica: October 21, 1950
PETA invites Lady Gaga to explain meat dress
Bacon Kevin Bacon - The Six Degrees of Food

White Horrific Sesame

The great white mind so cluttered
by decay the graying boomers will hate
to pay for the beef of unemployment

having stolen the economics
behind their cheap groceries,
Tuskegee, and the architecture of years.

"White folks, hey, we coloreds have taken root
deep in the beef, the country, and his ruse.
We need to focus and prioritize."

-- Eric Elshtain

White America Has Lost Its Mind
Past Horrific Experiments Stir Concerns of Today
'Sesame Street' Was Naughty Way Before Katy Perry

Ah, Sugar Sugar

Friday, the sight of Shakespeare
in a sugar coffin surprised
thousands of pedestrians.

Cardboard consumers—three
sheets to the wind—marched
on slick, high-fructose city streets.

Show some solidarity: Confound
"natural" consumer clogging.
Save a wolf in sheep's syrup.

-- Angela Genusa

HFCS Name Change: Good, Bad or In Between?
5 dead as drenching rains take aim at New England
In Costa Rica, Higher Education Serves the Few

Believing Competing Histories

Vague external threats
confront the galaxy.
An onslaught of biting indignities

discredits nebulous negative notions.
The Better Business Bureau fumed,
then exploded with rage.

With fiercely offensive footage,
proceedings and investigations,
they'll struggle to save the vaunted fables.

-- Scott Stoller

The American dream: Is it slipping away?
Democrats Unleash Ads Focusing on Rivals’ Pasts
Beckham: "Say it to my face"